I'm not crazy, really.
That screaming you heard from the garage on Monday morning, that was um, that was my happy filled with excitement scream. OK fine, that was actually my scream that gets the kids to stop their own screaming for just one minute while they try to figure out what in the world mommy is doing.
Earlier Monday morning I reminded myself not to start yelling because that meant they had control over me (Being a good mom who reads good parenting books, I felt proud of myself for remembering this good piece of advice). So I kept my voice in check. Held my temper down. We were going to make it out of the house with all of mommy's emotions bubbling up, but not yet boiling over.
And then he said it.
In the middle of a heated argument with Asher about why I wasn't even going to discuss with him whether or not he needed going to school, he shot back at me, "All you do is stay at home with the kids."
Hold everything.
That statement is the one causing every stay at home mom to suck in her breath and decide which aspect of that outrageousness to address first.
Should I list out the billion examples of what I do during the day other than just sit on the couch watching kids? Or maybe I needed to let out my pent up frustration over sacrifices of money and self-satisfaction given up to stay at home.
In one millisecond, of my anger, I thought of describing how much I cared about him and his brother and sister and this love motivates me to stay at home with them.
But, continuing with my good mom facade, I simply told him that staying home with the kids doesn't mean I don't do anything all day.
I left it at that and continued the crazy morning routine of getting Amelie to speed up and convincing Asa he does need to wear a diaper and we do not need to carry all of his earthly possessions into the car.
It was this shrieking insistence from my baby that he needed to bring giraffes and snacks and blankets into the car, which made my emotion boil out. I screamed as I carried him to the van. I kept screaming while I buckled him in.
All three kids stopped their own screaming, whining and arguing and stared.
I think they got it that now was the time for obedience and quickly getting into the car.
For the three minute drive to drop Asher off at school, I laid out what I do all day. I described what life would be like for me (lots of positives!) and for them (lots of negatives!) if I did not stay at home with them. Whether they understood or will remember, I don't think so, but I dot think Asher will not be saying that again - at least not in the near future.
We continued our drive, dropped Amelie off at preschool. Then Asa and I waited at church for mom's group to begin. While we waited, I realized my baby never really did get to finish his breakfast, but at least he had brought his pop-tart along.
What a good mom I am.
That screaming you heard from the garage on Monday morning, that was um, that was my happy filled with excitement scream. OK fine, that was actually my scream that gets the kids to stop their own screaming for just one minute while they try to figure out what in the world mommy is doing.
Earlier Monday morning I reminded myself not to start yelling because that meant they had control over me (Being a good mom who reads good parenting books, I felt proud of myself for remembering this good piece of advice). So I kept my voice in check. Held my temper down. We were going to make it out of the house with all of mommy's emotions bubbling up, but not yet boiling over.
And then he said it.
In the middle of a heated argument with Asher about why I wasn't even going to discuss with him whether or not he needed going to school, he shot back at me, "All you do is stay at home with the kids."
Hold everything.
That statement is the one causing every stay at home mom to suck in her breath and decide which aspect of that outrageousness to address first.
Should I list out the billion examples of what I do during the day other than just sit on the couch watching kids? Or maybe I needed to let out my pent up frustration over sacrifices of money and self-satisfaction given up to stay at home.
In one millisecond, of my anger, I thought of describing how much I cared about him and his brother and sister and this love motivates me to stay at home with them.
But, continuing with my good mom facade, I simply told him that staying home with the kids doesn't mean I don't do anything all day.
I left it at that and continued the crazy morning routine of getting Amelie to speed up and convincing Asa he does need to wear a diaper and we do not need to carry all of his earthly possessions into the car.
It was this shrieking insistence from my baby that he needed to bring giraffes and snacks and blankets into the car, which made my emotion boil out. I screamed as I carried him to the van. I kept screaming while I buckled him in.
All three kids stopped their own screaming, whining and arguing and stared.
I think they got it that now was the time for obedience and quickly getting into the car.
For the three minute drive to drop Asher off at school, I laid out what I do all day. I described what life would be like for me (lots of positives!) and for them (lots of negatives!) if I did not stay at home with them. Whether they understood or will remember, I don't think so, but I dot think Asher will not be saying that again - at least not in the near future.
We continued our drive, dropped Amelie off at preschool. Then Asa and I waited at church for mom's group to begin. While we waited, I realized my baby never really did get to finish his breakfast, but at least he had brought his pop-tart along.
What a good mom I am.
4 comments:
:0)Nothing wrong with the kids seeing they have a mom who has passion and a little heat in her. You're a mom I will come to for advice when I have my own kids. Keep doing what your doing!
<3 ~ Aunt Laura
Love this Angie! SOOO can relate. :)
Thanks Laura, hopefully I can give you some better advice than to scream! :)
I love those parenting books that say "just use your calm voice. Make sure to always use your calm voice." I WOULD LOVE TO USE MY CALM VOICE BUT HOW CAN I WHEN I FEEL LIKE I'M GOING TO EXPLODE INSIDE? That's what I scream inside my head to myself while I use my teeny, tiny, quiet little calm voice. You're a good mom. You're an awesome mom. You're one of my favorite moms. You're your kids favorite mom. Yes you are, even when they say obnoxiously hurtful things. Thanks for sharing. I had a good giggle imagining sweet Angie screaming right along with your kids. Can't say I haven't been there myself recently. Love you Ang.
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